i warned you all that i am a super pro procrastinator. starting this blog came with the… oh shit, what’s the word… (‘foreclosure’ and ‘stipend’ flash in my weird brain and are totally not at all what i am searching for)… i’m going to go with PRESAGE (thanks, online thesaurus)… anyway, starting this blog came with a presage that i very likely might bail. it’s not because i am lazy. it’s because i am not the biggest fan of small talk. if i don’t have anything to say, i’m not going to eek something out just to fill the void or keep my stats up. i have too much respect for you to treat you as if our blog writer/blog reader relationship might only be yada yada fodder. as i mentioned previously, i’m always searching for something deeper…
i am back in pittsburgh. it feels nice and it feels different. maybe it’s because everything outside is suddenly green and alive. maybe it’s because my best friend is moving here in a month and my brain is operating my eyes in a fresh way, always on the lookout for future adventures with her. maybe it’s because the last time i sat on this slouchy brown futon i felt like i was dying. now, much like the drying hospital flowers on my window sill, i feel transformed… a more solemn, quiet, wiser version of better than ever.
it could also be the fact that i spent the last few weeks at home, in Dagtown, USA. i may have mentioned before that it is my favorite place on earth. it always has been, it always will be. it’s quiet and unchanging and everyone has lived there for 100 years and they all help each other out. it’s a comfort to know that no matter how many transformations i may endure (there have already been at least a handful), there is always that place i can go to where i am the same and unchanged, in simpatico with my surroundings. do you have a favorite place to return to? i hope so. even if it’s a place you can close your eyes and find wherever you may go, i believe it’s very important to carry home with you and revisit it once in a while in any way you can. hop in the car, meditate, click your heels and repeat the mantra ‘there is no place like home’…
i’m planted back, solid, on the other beloved end of the home spectrum. back to noise, paved roads. the smell of manure is replaced with an olfactory rainbow of street meat, car exhaust and the faint Mothers Mary and Nature.
i hope this post compels you to join the search for something deeper and to take home with you wherever the seeking leads.
and now… a self portrait?